Julia and Paul's "All Miranda" Blog	Charles, Cecelia, and Olivia's Home on the Web
Erin and Mike's "All Ella & Sofia" Blog	Sid and Lisa's Lame Facebook Page
Life on the Half Street	jimdunlap.net

December 17, 2008 (12:30 am) As you can see, it is much too late tonight for much of a Lame Web Page blog post. However I will submit this for review - this weekend's wine tasting at the Grapevine Market featured some outstanding selections. We have trouble keeping track of the good wines we've discovered at the tastings, no thanks to me recycling the bottles without writing down the names.

In an attempt to prevent this tragedy we are teaming up with Lame Web Page wine and spirits organizer Mike, to create a database of the many wines we have tried. Meaning of course Mike will come up with the database. Our small contribution will be blog posts with the names and brief reviews of the wines we like; to live forever etched in a Lame blog post. Let's start with an exciting visual:

Here's the lineup. First we have a Prosecco from Carpene Malmolti in Italy. This is a dry, sparkling wine. I'm not a fan of sparkling wine, especially dry and yeasty, but I love this. It's crisp and clean and fun to drink. Next, we tried a Chardonnay from Ceja Vinyards in Napa Valley. Chardonnay is not one of my favorites, but this is so flavorful and the oak so strong, and really does taste creamy, and I did enjoy it a lot. It's pricey at $32.00 a bottle. Then we tried a Cabernet Franc from Casa Zuliani in Italy. This was our very favorite. If you've never had a Cabernet Franc but you like Cabernet give it a try. Tends to have a spicy taste, and it's very bold. When I drink wine, I like to taste it. Moderate price, $19.00 a bottle. We finished with a "Mariposa" Brachetto from Casalone also in Italy. I love Brachetto, it's a sweet red that's almost like a desert wine, however this one tastes to botanical, like flowers, that it helps temper the sweetness. I could drink a gallon. Not to expensive for Brachetto at $18.00 a bottle. Lame Web Page family, these are just some of the treats you'll get to enjoy over Christmas!

December 1, 2008 (10:30 pm) Day two of "CONREV", the official Lame Web Page "Content Revitalization" project. I am proud to present a new movie review, "Burn After Reading." Check it out in the Lame Movie Review section to the left. I assume given how long it's been since updates everyone* has forgotten how to navigate.

Let's take a quick look at the news, this time from Yahoo UK, let's see what those annoying Brits are reporting on these days. Can't possibly be more annoying than the recession doom and gloom we're being fed.

Useless story - Babies pushed in strollers facing away from their parents will be messed up anxious adults. Here's the brilliant study - "researchers" had 20 babies, pushed for a mile, half the time facing the parents and half the time away. When facing their care takers the babies talked, smiled, stayed awake, etc. When facing away, they laughed and talked less, and "suffered more stress" - without elaborating on what that means. Shame on anyone for drawing conclusions from that about the future condition of these infants. Please recall up until about 10 years ago all strollers faced away from the pusher, and duh the kid's going to laugh and talk less when not facing a person, unless it's a complete nut job anyway. Maybe the kid is observing the world - this notion a kid has to be 100% engaged 100% of the time (parent, caregiver, dvd, etc.) seems misguided. Spoken like a true person with no children. A similar study in the US was nixed because researchers couldn't find enough people who can push a stroller for a mile.

This is sad, and quite odd, and seems like something that could only happen in England - a 12 year old boy died when he went into cardiac arrhythmia after using too much "Lynx" aerosol deodorant in the confined space of his bathroom. You've been warned.

McDonald's in Morocco was criticized for distributing a regional map with their "Happy Meal" product that excluded Western Sahara from Morocco. You will recall Morocco annexed Western Sahara in 1975 after Spain gave up the territory. The real story - McDonalds puts maps in Happy Meals? I can't see that going over too well here in the States. Gimme a Shrek!

From Canada, which might as well be England, the "Supreme" Court of Canada has determined the functionally disabled obese** have the right to occupy two airplane seats while only paying for one. I'm torn here - I do not like when the obese take up two seats on a plane when one happens to also be mine, which seems to happen a lot. So yes, I would prefer two seats be reserved for these people. At the time same, one fare for two seats means the rest of us, who fit in one seat, will get to split the cost. Who declared flying to be a God given or Constitutional right?

* Lisa, Mom

** Fat person

November 30, 2008 (11:00 pm) Hope everyone had an outstanding Thanksgiving! We went to Dallas and enjoyed an excellent dinner with the Dunlaps and Chris. On our way back home we stopped by Bryan / College Station and visited Messina Hof for an excellent wine tasting which I'll tell you more about tomorrow, then off to Cafe Eccel for wood fired pizza and a strawberry tart. Then I got to talk to Alex, which is always a wonderful thing, then Saturday and Sunday I worked on projects around the house while Lisa worked and laid around sicker than a (sick) dog.

November 20, 2008 (11:15 pm) Setting new records for lack of blog updates! I must put a stop to the bleeding. Many, many, many November birthdays have passed by without so much as a mention on here, so I have to acknowledge Lame Web Page Sister Erin, Lame Web Page Mom Mom, and Lame Web Page Friend Suzanne as they all add another year to the countdown to, well, you know.

In happier news Lisa and I have joined the Wii club. Let's just say my arm really hurts, and Lisa can beat anyone, and I mean anyone, in boxing. There are about 100,000 accessories we now need.

This irks me - story in Yahoo news about the children's starving in Haiti. The hurricanes of last season decimated crops and food supplies. The UN asked for $105 million in aid but donor countries could only come up with a third of that necessary amount. Let me put that amount in perspective. The CEOs of the "big three" US auto manufactures fly their private jets from Detroit to Washingon DC to beg for aid to stave of much deserved insolvency. The money the UN asked for to help starving children is 0.004 the amount requested by GM. We should be ashamed, and if anyone votes "yes" to this aid package I will make it an official Lame Web Page mission to make sure that person is voted out of office next election. We all know the financial sector bailout is a tough pill we have to swallow, but the automakers will not make or break the World's economy. I'm getting of the soapbox now, like I said my arm hurts.

November 2, 2008 (10:00 pm) Feels like 11:00pm!

October 27, 2008 (11:00 pm) I read that an 8 year old boy was killed at a gun show when the 9mm Uzi he was firing recoiled and he shot himself in the head. Now I'm much, much too agitated to write a blog.

October 22, 2008 (11:00 pm) So much so say, so many stories to tell, so little time. I apologize for the lack of updates during the busy late summer / early fall season. Just to give you an idea of how much we've been gone, here's the run down of the flying I've done in the last five weeks: Reno / Lake Tahoe (Alex and Cliff's Best Ever Wedding), Chicago and Tampa (work), Lima Peru to visit the Coleman / Roe clan, and finally San Diego to celebrate Jim Brownell's big time 70th birthday! Fun, fun, fun. We're heading off to Dallas this weekend, so don't expect to see any pictures for a while!

October 2, 2008 (11:59 pm) A super happy fun time Peruvian "feliz cumpleanos" to official Lame Web Page world traveller girl Olivia, who enjoys birthday #5 today (cinco, I believe). Happy birthday Olivia! In typical Sid fashion this picture is outdated, but at least it's from this year. We'll see you next week!

September 27, 2008 (11:00 pm) Today is the day we wish a very special Lame Web Page Happy Birthday to new Husband of Alex, Cliff! Happy Birthday Cliff! Cliff is a connoisseur of the mighty fine instrument, the ukulele. To celebrate, I dug up my favorite picture of Cliff, dressed up as Tiny Tim (hopefully for halloween but you can't be sure) and made a special sound just for you. Keeping in the spirit of my addition to the wonderfully terrible song "MacArthur Park", I found a version by of all things the Great Britian Ukulele Symphony! Sit back and enjoy, and a very happy birthday Cliff!

September 25, 2008 (10:45 pm) I have a problem, an addiction problem. My addiction is bad, terrible music. Poor Lisa, have sympathy for my poor wife. I'll give you an example. I am completely obsessed with "MacArthur Park". To make matters worse, I'm addicted to the Richard Harris version, not the slightly more tolerable Donna Summer version. For those of you who may for whatever reason be unfamiliar with this gem of a song, I'll give you a little background. Written in the 60's by Jimmy Web and intended for The Association ("Along Comes Mary", "Cherish", etc.) but turned down because it's just too terrible even for them. In 1968 for some odd reason thespian Richard Harris decides to record it. To add to the confusion it reaches number two on the charts. To understand this masterpiece we need to look at both the performance and the lyrics. As for the performance, it's just a hair out of Harris' range, especially the last verse that he sings entirely in falsetto. This just adds to the grandeur. Incidentally, the name of the album is "A Tramp Shining", which is the most awesome name for an album ever.

On to the lyrics - MacArthur Park is in Los Angeles, and although I've never been, it must be spectacular to inspire such a song. The metaphors in the song are completely nonsensical and impossible to decipher. For example, "MacArthur Park is melting in the dark, all the sweet green icing flowing down." Moving back to the performance, Harris incorrectly sings "MacArthur's Park" throughout the song. The most memorable line is of course "Someone left the cake out in the rain." Naturally something so awful has penetrated pop culture in many, many covert ways - including a parody by the master Weird Al, called "Jurassic Park" about the movie. The song's lavish James Bond chase sequence music works well for the Weird Al chased by dinosaurs sequence. At least Weird Al's version makes sense, and he can hit the notes. The most dubious distinction is having been named "The Worst Song of All Time" in a Dave Barry survey.

Of course there's a Seinfeld reference here - it's the song George as a child would pretend to sing into a statue. Also there are numerous references to the song in The Simpsons. Provided you believe Wikipedia.

Intrigued? Enjoy a little sample, then go to Amazon or iTunes and buy it! Next in Sid's series "Terrible Music I Can't Get Enough Of", we'll discuss "Convoy" by C. W. McCall - "We'll roll this truckin' convey, 'cross the USA!"

September 23, 2008 (9:00 pm) So much has happened in the last few weeks and yet I have not taken the time to sit down and tell you all about it. And this is not the time, as I for no reason whatsoever am tired after my trip to Chicago. Of course, the serious fun came about in Lake Tahoe for the Best Ever Wedding of Alex and Cliff. Then off to Chicago, and now home. Lots of old pictures to post, this weekend contains no plans but to be at home so I promise (you can take that to the bank, or preferably a failed mortgage lender) to post some stories.

September 10, 2008 (11:45 pm) There's an email making the rounds that claims to link to a Barack Obama sex video. Guess what, it's a virus. If you click on a link that's supposed to be a link to a sex tape of Obama you deserve a virus.

September 4, 2008 (11:30 pm) Breaking news from Lame Web Page Election World Headquarters, I am please to announce as official correspondent for our “Election 2008: Brace Yourselves for Change” coverage is… Lisa!

This comes about after Lisa’s impressive demonstration of her knowledge and insight to the proceedings of the recent Democrat and the ongoing Republican National Conventions, expressed during dinner at our new favorite and fortunately local restaurant, “Yamada”. Louis the waiter knew to bring us iced tea, asked if we were splitting sesame chicken again (no, it is after all Japanese restaurant) and tried to talk us into delicious lettuce wraps. I had chicken yakisoba, in spite of ordering shrimp, and Lisa beef with broccoli. The Miso soup is light and flavorful. The atmosphere is subtle and clean, the lighting is indirect and soft. The music is at times a bit odd, and although we don’t eat sushi the sushi bar adds a nice touch, because raw fish is kind of pretty.

Welcome to eating with Sid, featuring reviews of local area restaurants and attractions. That’s not really why we’re here, so back to politics. To demonstrate that she is decidedly “cutting edge”, Lisa pointed out she has not watched a minute of coverage on television, she enjoys catching the action on Youtube. Andy Roddick just lost to “Kim” Novak Djokovic at the US Open. Darn. Lisa, welcome to your new role. This does indeed mean you have to write something. If you have time to watch convention coverage on Youtube you have time to write something. Please?

On to a little news, I have a beef today with the website lifescience.com. I’m sick and tired of whiny sniveling liberals laying claim to science. To liberals, left wing ideas are “science” and conservative ideals are “nut job”. Make sure you know that for the most part I follow the latter, however I am tied of liberal agendas masquerading as science.

There is an article today from lifescience.com via Yahoo! News that there are people out there in the U.S. who do not watch TV. I’m sick of hippies bad-mouthing TV. Naturally the article points out all of the evils of watching television. Here’s a gem – “In contrast to the average American adult, who watches three hours of television a day, non-watchers fill their time with a plethora of activities.” The author points out all of the wonderful ways “non-watchers” fill up their time, noting “Overall, they tend to do more of everything.” On to the usual: TV makes children more aggressive, demand junk food, lose their ability to entertain themselves, etc. And in the spirit of “science” being blind and unbiased the author of the book on which the article is based, Marina “Ahoy, I’d like to buy a vowel” Krcmar admits she gave up TV 13 years ago.

The best part of the article is that her “research” of 62 houses without television indicates people who shun TV fall into two general categories – pot-smoking granola munching unshorn activist counter-cultural wussies and hair brading long dress wearing no birth control ten kids everything is God’s Will FLDR living prudes. I love that these two groups have something in common. Perhaps now there can be peace and understanding in the world.

So it’s this that brought me to explorer a little of my distain for lifescience.com. I poked on over to their website and took note of a couple of irritating examples. In the “Culture” section, which should be renamed the “Elitist Liberal Cultural” section, the top articles are:

1. "Survey: Keep Religion Out of Politics” – liberal ideal
2. “’Street’ Drug Use Down, Rx Drug Abuse Rising” – prescription drug use is of course a favorite of conservatives (right, Rush?) and the hippies prefer the “street” stuff
3. “Our Mates Look Like Mom and Dad” – not a particular agenda but a decided waste of time and resources, which is a liberal agenda
4. “Is Sarah Palin a Creationist” – this is a poorly written article by Massimo “Porky” Pigliucci, who has the gall to have the self appointment title of “Scientific Blogging”. Now granted I do fall to the “evolution” side of things, but frankly believe in God because no matter how close we peer to the beginning of the Universe and how small we define the basic building blocks of matter science can’t find a better explanation for either the idea of something out of nothing or the concept of infinite existence. To read the article you get the impression that a creationist might as well embody Satan himself (oh wait, author us probably an atheist). We were all taught the story in Sunday school and we’ve all somehow managed to mature and maintain open and analytical minds to arrive at our own conclusions. You really have to read this bitter and sad piece of work for yourselves. And to think it’s masquerading as “science.”
5. “The Politics of Hurricane Gustav” – Yes, lifescience.com is determined to bring divisive politics to a weather phenomenon

At this point you’re probably bored and tired (I am) but the above is not what sends me on this tirade. It’s a lifescience.com feature “10 Technologies That Will Transform Your Life”. Written by Lamont “Sanford” Wood, it contains ridiculously simplistic clarifications of points so they can be understood by the “Ignorance Belt” (again, read the article mentioned above). This context is what allows me to really enjoy this first line – “Predictions are risky, especially when they concern the future.” You’re right Lamont, much more risky that predictions about the past, which are almost foolproof. For example, I predict Andy Roddick will lose his US Open match earlier tonight. Check me on this, I dare you. Here are a couple more gems:

“Gene Therapy and/or Stem Cells” – Lamont points out many maladies involve inherited conditions. For the “Ignorance Belt” he clarifies “they’re in your genes, in other words.” Why not go all the way and define malady for us, or use something we can all understand like “the cruds” or “sick as a one-armed hunter in a deer blind with no corn” (used it all to make ethanol). Lamont goes on to explain that “Perhaps, someday, birth defects will be as treatable as pneumonia.” Maybe like the pneumonia that killed Bernie Mac, Jim Henson, and the other 67,000 people who on average die every year from the disease. Combined with the flu they the seventh leading cause of death in the U.S. The next time you use an analogy like that use something really curable like athlete’s foot. The last thing we need is people in the “Ignorance Belt” not taking a diagnosis seriously.

And the number one least interesting top ten technology that will transform the liberal elite’s lives – “Location-Based Computing”. The explanation is “Instead of clicking an icon” you can “walk outside, point your cell phone at an actual three-dimensional thing (presumably, a building that houses a business), click the phone, and get information about (or jump to the Web site of) whatever you were pointing at.”

One small problem here. The icon you refer to is at my home, at my desk. The building that houses a business is not within walking distance, and by the time I’m STANDING IN FRONT OF THE BUSINESS perhaps I’ll just go inside and take a look-see around. Just to please Lamont the next time I want to know the business hours of a store or if they have a particular product I’m going to jump in the car (the less fuel efficient Accord) and drive there instead of wasting my time with the internet.

That’s all for tonight’s rant, look for some thoughtful and insightful election coverage from Lisa in the coming days.

September 1, 2008 (11:00 am) Happy Labor Day everyone! This really is the "hot" season for Birthdays - today is Lame Web Page friend Jenny's birthday, out in beautiful Los Angeles (Huntington Beach actually) - Happy birthday Jenny! As usual, your present will be late. And of course we're thrilled to have one more to add, Sofia "Sophia" Rose Martinez the First on August 28. Correction to the time of birth, 2:20 Eastern, 1:20 Central, and after your local news on the West Coast. Here's the official new baby photo from Erin and Mike, notice the heightened sense of self and others exhibited by Sofia compared with other lesser babies:

Proud Aunt Lisa notes it looks like Sofia might be saying "Arrrrrgggggg" like a pirate, and of course I can't let that slide:

Just for fun, to give you some perspective of what it means to me a stout and healthy 9 lb. 7 1/2 oz. baby, let's look at a couple of other items with the same weight:

This Guitar

This baby ewe

This guy's fish

Proud two-time champion Uncle Crazy Uncle Sid still hasn't completely decided how to spell his new neice's name. I understand some might think it's really up to the parents, but since I live in my own world I have my own rules I'm still deciding. Sofia is of Spanish origin, and also is German spelling of the Greek name Sophia. Sophia appears frequently in Greek philosophy and means "wisdom". I've made my decision - Sofia it will be! Just like Sofia Coppola, you can't beat that.

Sofia is the Capital of Bulgaria, and is one of the oldest and most beautiful cities in Europe.

August 28, 2008 (10:15 pm) What a day, what a glorious day! The Lame Web Page is proud, pleased, thrilled, honored, and excited to annouce a new addition to the family. Sophia Rose Martinez entered the world in dramatic fashion today at about 1:20pm Eastern time. Weighing in at a robust 9 lbs. 5 oz. (That's 250 in adult pounds!) and a long 21" inches (she's already taller than Verne Troyer!) Proud Aunt Lisa and Uncle Sid are doing well and resting comfortably. I hear Mother, Baby, Sister, and Dad are doing pretty well too. Dad promised a fresh photo of Sophia but the cell phone remains photo-free, as far as I can tell.

August 27. 2008 (10:45 pm) The Lame Web Page would like to acknowledge a very special birthday. Today we celebrate the 100th birthday of our 36th President, Lyndon Baines "LBJ" Johnson. More than just a freeway in Dallas, we remember a education, civil rights, and social equality pioneer. If not for his pesky escalation of American involvement in the Vietnam war I'm sure we're be looking back on a two-timer.

By the way, it's also Official Lame Web friend and contributor Charles' big Peruvian birthday! Felix Navidad or whatever the hell it is in Peruvian*. Can't wait to see you all in October!

*Felix Cumpleaños

August 23, 2008 (12:01 am) Special Lame Web Page announcement - Lisa is officially one year older! Whoo hoo! More on the monumental day as it unfolds. Happy birthday buddy, I love you!!!

August 19, 2008 (11:47 pm) Another dawning of a thought - if you tend to the sensitive side you might want to skip the top ten list, it is after all about pornography.

August 19, 2008 (11:45 pm) It has just dawned on me the "Top Ten" section wasn't updated often enough to make it "picturnator" worthy, so it's be relegated to the "Resources" section to the left.

August 19, 2008 (9:45 pm) Wow I'm behind. I've missed critical posts, such as "Happy 2nd Birthday Ella" (August 14). My plan as always, too grand and destined to fail. Using "terrible twos" as my theme I wanted to make a flash animation of Ella using the laser beam emitting eyes that I hear two-year-olds develop to destroy all of the things that I can pretend Ella doesn't like. Problem one is I seem to be losing my ability to make flash animations, which really boils down to practice. Problem two is I have an old version, Flash 5, and Flash MX or 2007 would make it a lot easier to use photos in the animations because they can import Photoshop images with transparent backgrounds. But that's another story. So, big time late number two birthday wishes to official Lame Web Page niece and Goddaughter Ella. Enjoy the cute smile!

Just for fun, let's look at the news together

AP story via Yahoo news - "Nader predicts Obama to pick Clinton" The problem with this story is nobody cares what you think, so let's not waste our time. I do enjoy how the article describes Nader as a "liberal activist and maverick presidential candidate". Maverick is just another nice way to say loser. I still blame him for Little Georgie's first term.

From Reuters (très bien) also via Yahoo - "Cash: Political use of father's name 'appalling'" Rosanne Cash expressed disgust that people keep invoking the name of her Father, Johnny Cash, to promote political agenda. Me too, I can't go five minutes without someone saying "Johnny Cash would vote for Nader, and so should you". Seriously, when where how is this occurring? The story references one instant when John "who?" Rich said at a concert (apparently he is a County star) that if Johnny Cash was alive today he'd walk the line with McCain or something to that affect. Seriously, chill out.

So far, this has been one of the most boring Lame Web Page news recaps to date. I'm going to have to dig deep to pull this one out. Also from Reuters (nos pieds font mal, oui, nous tous), some fine reporting from Ashleigh "Ashley" Patterson "New porn channel lets Canadians strut their stuff". A company with the extremely creative name of "Real Productions" has been granted approval to launch a new subscription pornography channel (Adult Programming, as we like to call it here in the States) that promised to deliver a minimum fifty percent domestic (as in, Canada) porn programming. The President of Real Productions notes "I think as Canadians there is a bit of a tiredness in seeing all American stuff." Absolutely, I can't imagine Canadians can put up with much American porn, the cultural, physical, and frankly sexual difference between the two Countries surely has left Canadians with an unfulfilled need forMaple Flavored Love. Really, if you compare two porn flicks*, one Canadian and one American, will you really be able to tell the difference between the two?

This has inspired me to write a top ten list to help you with this one! Check out the"Top Ten List" section over there on your left. I should also point out Real Productions boasts the "largest collection of Canadian adult-themed content" consisting of, and I am not making this up, two hundred titles. A typical American male will go through that in twenty minutes. Better get to work. If you're looking for some new talent bear in mind Comrade Alex is just around the corner. Considering Comrade Alex's last porn experience was performing to the whims of his Siberian prison guards if you pay him even a pittance he'll be thrilled.

*Add to "to do" list

August 5, 2008 (10:15 pm) A very special Lame Web Page "Happy Birthday" to official Ella Dad Mike, happy birthday Mike! I'd love to give you a less lame shout-out, perhaps even with a picture copped from your own website, but frankly I'm too darn tired.

August 2, 2008 (11:30 pm) I'm please to annouce a potpourri of minor Lame Web Page updates. First, I'm proud to annouce a new movie review, "Mamma Mia". Check it out in the movie reviews section.

Also, a "thank you" to Charles for providing a new Lame Top Ten list. Due to the top ten drought I removed the top ten link from the Lame picturnator, but it does still exist - in the "Resources" section.

I also archived the Lame 2007 blog entries for faster page loading and enjoyment. Finally, just couple of entertaining "Lisaisms" - today at the Grapevine Market we were tasting a selection of five wines and our pourer was talking to someone else so another person came up and asked "Which wine are you on"? A good answer might have been "The Merlot" but before the words could come out Lisa replied "The next one." Lisaism #2, a couple of nights ago we wanted to watch a little TV together, and we were scrolling through the DVR choices looking for something to watch. Usual fare, lots of home improvement shows, and lots of mixed martial-arts fighting. I asked Lisa if she wanted to watch "Flip this house" and she replied "Maybe I'm weird - I just like watching guys beat each other up."

In the news, the release of a major new video game from Sony has been delayed because it didn't pass the "seizure" test. According to research from "experts" 0.2% of the population can experience seizures from video games or other sources of fast motion and lights. When I come to power anything that affects 0.5% of the population or less will be ignored by the rest of society. If 0.3% of the population are stupid enough to it's safe to do the things we see in commercials then we can remove the disclaimers like "professional driver on closed course". No more lawsuits either (bearing in mind the 0.5% rule). For example - Judge to expert - "Expert, what percentage of the population thinks it's safe to ride a bicycle backwards while wearing flip-flops and eating a hamburger?" Expert to judge - "0.4%."
Judge to defendent - "Case dismissed."

July 30, 2008 (9:50 pm) I've managed to fall way, way behind on blogs - and guess what, you're not getting one tonight either. I'm just too darn tired.

July 21, 2008 (11:30 pm) A very special Lame Web Page birthday greeting today, so special it's pulled me out of my two week "blog funk" just to wish Stephanie a very happy 40th (or something like that) birthday. Happy birthday Stephanie, we enjoyed seeing you over the weekend!

July 8, 2008 (10:10 pm) I'm just too tired to write anything tonight. Seriously.

July 4, 2008 (10:30 pm) Happy 4th of July everyone! This might just be the day to discuss my general irritation with all things British, but we won't go there tonight. Don't get me wrong, I'm a big "Monty Python" fan and my favorite television show is currently "Top Gear", but there's not much else good I can think of. Let's get on to more exciting and wonderful things. I'm well overdue on some Lame Web Page congratulations. Not necessarily in the correct order, but that's the nature of this place.

First, wild big time congratulations to Anne Marie for grinding through four years of High School to achieve the title of "High School Graduate". Rumor has it she will be attending Texas Southern, which has an outstanding art program that will come in quite handy as Anne Marie is an outstandingly talented artist. This leaves one more to go, John "The Jominator" who enters High School this year. I'm proud of all of my cousins!

Next, super "movin' up the career ladder" kudos to Mike, or as he's better known "Ella's Padre" on achieving the rank of "Lieutenant Commander" in the U.S. Navy! This just has a nice ring to it. I should point out this rank contains the second highest letter count of the Naval ranks, and I'm guessing falls somewhere between "Lieutenant" and "Commander". There's also a leaf involved somewhere. I should also point out Mike received glowing praise for his Master's thesis in War College. Something I plan to read after I finish the Beatles book Erin and Mike gave me. Congratulations on the achievement, although the new uniform looks a little "out there".

And finally, for all of the Lame Web Page readers not paying too much attention, big time bliss is a comin' special wow congratulations to Alex and Cliff, set to exchange wedding vows (let's just call them "wows", or "wow vows") this fall. What a great couple, I think Cliff is actually good enough for Alex. Ask me 10 years ago if I thought that person existed, I would have said no. But that was before I met Cliff. You two enjoy every moment of this fantastic adventure! I was beyond honored to be there to help Alex shop for a wedding dress, and that was moving, and frankly I don't move, but damn, I got moved. I'm getting moved just thinking about the whole thing. Let's get on to a picture.

... and finally, literary congratulations to official Lame Web Page Dad, Dad, on landing yet publishing deal for his book, "Sam Snake Says". Soak in the title now, because I notice Dad didn't mention it in his "official" blog on jimdunlap.net. One more quick note with some late breaking news - our neighborhood has never been at a loss for celebration fireworks (at least in the year since we're lived here) so we were treated to a night of "professional grade" fireworks. Unfortunately the journey began with a little idiot kid holding a roman candle and basically shooting the thing at us, and in the ensuing scramble Lisa fell, sprawled, and scraped a good chunk of skin off her finger and knee. Pictures to come!

June 29, 2008 (10:34 pm) Another weekend finished, not too much accomplished today. I managed to get another coat of paint in the bathroom so it's ready for "color", but that's about it. I did also manage to muster the energy to finally post some pictures from out trip to San Francisco in January. Check them out in the pictures section.

Tile, ready to be grouted.

Walls, ready to be painted

In other news, our yard is brown. Yep, brown. No rain, and water restrictions in effect. And unfortuntely all of the thunder we're having tonight isn't having any positive effect on the yard. You can scroll down and see how good it used to be.

 

June 19, 2008 (11:25 pm) Not much time left in the day for a blog, but there are a few things we need to cover. I'm disturbed to have learned about a type of coffee called "Kopi Luwak" that is given its special flavor-flave and rarity from Indonesian Sumatra coffee beans, with a twist - the berries are eaten by a civet*, pooped to the ground, gently rinsed and sold to the world for about the same price as gold, or even gasoline. $50 a cup, I kid you not. Maybe if the same process was undertaken by Chinese actress Faye Wong, or Howie Mandel, I'd give a cup a try.

*Kind of a pointy snouted rat / cat looking thing

And finally, I received a very useful tip from Comrade Alex. Let's say you're in an argument, or as is so often the case these days an endless back-and-forth email chain, and you're seeking, no destined, to have the last word. Comrade Alex has found the solution. As with all good potions it should be used in moderation to avoid diluting the effect. He uses it with Stacey, and if it works with her it will work on anyone. I'll have to try it on Lisa. Works verbally as well. For example, I might write "I'm going to bed now" and you think no, I want more blog! I challenge you to refute this:

I'm going to bed now. Booya.

June 17, 2008 (11:45 pm) As you can see from the time don't expect much of a blog tonight. Except that I am excited to report a new pictures posting! I'm so behind on picture posting I decided to just go with the flow and post what's next in line, New Years 2008. Enjoy!

June 9, 2008 (9:30 pm) Wow, that "blog a day" thing didn't work out so well. I love the tag lines that the television schedule gives to certain shows and movies. For example, National Lampoon's "Vegas Vacation" describes Cousin Eddie, as played by Randy Quaid, as "boorish".

May 31, 2008 (10:30 pm) Another routine Saturday, slept in, had lunch and sampled ten, yes ten, wines at the Grapevine market, then puttered around the rest of the day without getting much accomplished.

May 30, 2008 (11:15 pm) Believe it or not it was one year ago today that we became the new owners of Cutaway Cove. My how time flies!

May 28, 2008 (10:45 pm) I just don't have the energy for a blog tonight. Tonight was uneventful, I came home late, made dinner, sat at the kitchen table with Lisa for a while talking, we watched two episodes of "Top Gear", then her nightly back rub (she pulled something today making it even more essential), watered the new sod (it's dead) and now here I am, about ready for bed.

May 27, 2008 (10:53 pm) The Great Return of the Lame Web Page Blog-a-day! Did I mention there are plenty of valid excuses for missing a daily blog? Perhaps Comrade Alex is up to encapsulating them in a Top Ten list. We're see.

So much to do, I have an exciting announcement from dear members of the Lame Web Page family, but will hold off until the proper graphics are prepared, befitting the news. I also have a great recap of official Lame Web Page future art scholar Anne Marie, and her graduation. Alas, it's late, even for me, so you'll just have to wait.

May 22, 2008 (11:05 pm) May 22, what a fine day, kind of rolls of the tongue - "5/22 or 5-2-2" or 2-2-May, you do it, it works. The real reason it's a fine day is Tasha is celebrating adding another year to that variable "age" that we've all been assigned. And Tasha's at that age where adding another year is a good a thing, as she propels from those teenage years to "wow, I'm 20". Well done Tasha, I hope you had a really fun birthday and we can't wait to see you this weekend!

To celebrate I copped a photo from Tasha's Myspace page, and I'm thrilled to see she's taking (taken, took, whatever) guitar lessons. We expect a performance this weekend, or at the very least we want to see your guitar.

May 21, 2008 (11:59pm) Whoa, just got in under the gun. I am completely obsessed with BBC's "Top Gear" program (or as our friends across the pond misspell it, "programme.") More on that later, right now it's time for bed.

May 20, 2008 (11:00 pm) It looks like I began my Halloween 2008 costume planning a bit early, I'm going as "Hillbilly Sid" this year. Looks like there will have to be at least one intermediate beard trim.

May 19, 2008 (11:56 PM) A blog a day continues, but today I have nothing to say.

May 18, 2008 (10:45 PM) Another weekend gone. Today was to be the day of working inside the house, specifically the bathroom. As mentioned previously We spent all day yesterday working on the yard, and for some freak reason we spent all day today working in the yard. The rundown - edged and weed-whacked, put some new concrete bed barriers between the yard and porch, mowed the backyard, took all of the rotten wood dividers between the concrete pads of the driveway and sidewalk out, spent a lot of money at Home Depot, went to lunch at Traxx, took a nap, cleaned up the front porch, in no particular order.

In celebration of a weekend spent in the sun (work will set you free!) Here are a couple of pictures. Yes, it is the best yard in the neighborhood, we can't deny. Erin was so nice to reply that our yard looked great in the last set of pictures, which although recently posted the pictures were from last fall. This is the real deal, taken mere hours ago.

The Lame Backyard, lush and delicious. And soon to be much sunnier when we have the trees pruned. We have two choices - let our soon to be dead silver leaf maple and ash tress continue to deny sun to our stunted but indigenous live oak, or open it up to some sun and deal with losing a lot of shade for a while. It's up to Lisa.

Cutaway Cove at dusk. You can see front and center the stupid ash tree we're trying to perk up with fertilizer.

Finally, the porch - with some deep purple plants that Lisa potted and a new hose reel.

May, 17, 2008 (11:30pm) I'm proud to announce the beginning of something very special - the Lame Web Page is proud to present "one blog every day!". Even something as simple as this announcement, come hell or high water I'm posting something. For today, I'll just run down the day. Slept in this morning, got up an puttered around the yard - pulling weeds, cleaning up branches from the storm. At 11 we met with Jim the arborist, for a quote to get our trees off of the roof and fence and to have some of the dead limbs removed. We also asked Jim's advice about the half dead Ash in the front and he suggested fertilizing with a natural fertilizer, Medina's "hasta grow" or "gotta grow" or "look out, she's gonna grow" or something like that.

We headed off to the Grapevine Market for our usual Saturday routine of spinach and goat cheese pizza for Lisa, and "The Skinny" prosciutto panini and mozzarella, basil, and tomato salad for me. Afterwards we tried four wines and some unbearably nasty Grappa. We liked the Australian Cabernet Savingnon so we got a bottle. Then we were off to Home Depot (after dropping the wine off at home so as not to cook it) in search of the Medina and some sod for the ex-bushes Charles and Parker whacked. The had some ok looking sod but no Medica, so we headed to a local nursery. Better to support the local business I suppose, but they were more expensive. The sod looked really nice and they had the Medina. We came home and spread some dirt to level the bed and put down the sod, realized we were 10 pieces short, headed back to the nursery, and came home and got the last down. I put the soaker hose on it and mowed the front yard, which took the better part of an hour and a half because the mower wouldn't start (spark plug) and the self propel clutch needed adjusting, and I bagged. I also moved a bunch of rocks from the French drain to the backyard and filled them with soil to the grass will grow over. Beauty before drainage! Then I mixed up the Medina, two gallons at a time, until I had poured forty gallons around the tree.

Then I took a break for dinner and had some leftovers from last night, when I made Sid's tomato chicken vegetable rice surprise. It was really good, maybe I'll write down the recipe and share it with you. Then Lisa and I watched a couple of episodes of Flight of the Conchords, I cleaned up, and we headed to town to see a play.

The play was very good, the premise is what would the "Peanuts" characters be like in high school? In summary gay, on drugs, sluts, and crazy. We stopped by Sonic for a late night drink and just got home. And now off to bed!

May 11, 2008 (10:30 pm) Happy Birthday! Happy Mother's Day! Happy Birthday! Happy Mother's Day! What to do when one day carries so much significance? Of course, it's time for a Lame Web Page shout-out to all the Moms, Moms of Moms, and Moms of Moms of Moms! Some were lucky enough to get breakfast in bed, and others a hamburger. Happy Mother's Day, Moms.